Earth is a secret place. Hidden away in the Milky Way Galaxy since eons and we are all riding on it like a monkey rides on a vine hanging from a tree, which is also on Earth! Now Earth is basically a very small planet if you consider how vast the Universe is and how insignificantly small we are, and yet we keep looking for a purpose to live and do something that can give meaning to our lives. Pathetic are we? I don’t think so.
Each Morning I wake up and go out my room to look at a giant star which shines so bright I can hardly look at it with my tiny eyes that rarely see the sun. I work in AC cubical closed off from the world staring at my computer that’s as old as Dr. Seuss and it doesn’t have any capability to help me with my daily problems! If only Dr. Seuss was alive. So what I want to say is, it’s winter, I feel happy waking up to see the sun and listening to the birds chirp in the mango trees as I brush my teeth and walk around the balcony as the cold breeze chills my cheeks and makes me wish I could sleep some more, but sadly, I have to go to office to make a few more millions for the company. My job doesn’t make me as happy even though it’s one of those safe-secure government job, I need to leave it soon, just waiting for the courage to do so and get on with my life.
So many of us keep being in place for reasons beyond comprehending for the fear of what after that? What about the paycheck? Who will pay the bills? What will I do with my life? While few brave souls just leave the job and work hard to get another good pay job that suits their likes. Not as easy as it seems, right?
Many of us keeps being with a lover/friend/people, they met few years ago and who broke their trust sometimes, said sorry and did the same shit all over again. Because we love them, because we can’t live without the, because we don’t know if we will ever love someone like that again? We keep asking ourselves, “Why? Why did this happen with me?” While we ourselves know the answers, “Who says life is fair? Where is that written?”Spending energy-emotions-themselves-their dreams etc on someone for so long can make one feel like they have wasted all those years of their lives or the things that you wanted to do but you couldn’t and you feel it was a waste and you can’t get all those years back anymore. Well it wasn’t a total waste if you learn from it, still smile at your mistakes and laugh it out, fill your lungs with new air and go about doing what you can do best with yourself. Sometimes we just lack the courage to move ahead and do something unexpected of us, because we are afraid what might happen, where will the path led, will we fail/succeed? So many questions bugger us and if we don’t find the motivation someway then we keep hanging by the thread, wishing and crying. Sometimes you have to motivate yourself.
Well, why am I writing this post? started with a giant shining star and now rushing off to relationships and jobs, just what the heck am I up to?
Hmmm… A new year is starting. 2016. Earth is going to begin a new round around the giant star, Sun-the BFG of our small universe. A lot of us have many questions going through our heads as we shout out, “Happy New Year” to those we love or those who we are spending that midnight with. I just want to tell you, whatever you dream, it’s possible, except if you are planning to eat the big giant, na na! you mustn’t, only Lord Hanuman can do that! :p If there’s something that you have been meaning to do for long, do it this year, don’t keep postponing the things you love because you can’t get a leave, you always can! Find the courage and give some of it to those around you, like happiness, courage increases if it’s shared.
Let me tell you something about my 2015. I spent the first half visiting different hospitals, hoping to find a cure for my weak body. I got tons of medicines like I did the year before it and it did no good. My bones were ever so weak and my blood ever so thin. I kept wondering just how did I manage to get my once point of jealousy strong self to this point? Medicines weren’t helping. I had to work on myself, my mind, my thinking, my work everything. I found courage from the love and support I got from my loved ones. I found that medicines alone can’t help me anymore, the fear of not getting well had to be shown the door, and boy I feel good since she left. I started doing the things I had put on hold because of my condition.
I began filling up the journal pages with my bizarre dreams and thoughts, when it wasn’t enough I started writing on the blog. Where for no obvious reasons, I slacked off from writing for a few months this year and whatever writing I did in my journals has stayed there since I couldn’t give enough time for those ideas to flourish and new ideas keep piling up inside those white lines pages. It’s really difficult to have a job, a body that is of a 60-year-old sickly human and a bug to write about the big scrumptulicious life.
I have a long way to go and the path has super fog all over it, I can’t see farther than an inch and boy I wish I could, for I am someone who likes to know if the water is cold before she jumps in. What I did last year? Almost nothing!
- I am just getting out of my sickness slowly and doing what I can with what I have got right now, it doesn’t seem much and even I keep wanting more from myself but my body has big limitations right now and I plan to get healthy before I just jump.
- For instance I do not have much energy left after I get back from work but I enjoy writing whenever I can, it makes me happy, so I started writing on this blog.
- I watched lots of movies and cartoons/anime, read lots of novels/manga. So you see, the year 2015 has been quite good for me, I lived it (however I can).
- Sickly I might be but I try my best to motivate people to do things they love and am so happy to see them progressing. Many times my motivation falls on deaf ears but none-the-less, I must try.
- I traveled! To the small hill that’s been standing there in my town since before I or you were born, I swear! It has helped hide Chhatrapati Shivaji once upon a time! & I also visited a small hut overlooking the great Arabian Sea just so I can gobble the scrumptilicious chicken and prawns!
- Started learning a new language. Man I want to visit that country soon!
- Met many interesting people who kept my love for life alive and who motivated me to keep writing despite the many troubles I am facing.
- I love my life and the ones in it. A big thanks to everyone who has been a part of my journey. I couldn’t have gotten this far without you.
This begs the question, what I will do next year? ummm, I am not so sure right now but I have a few gazillion ideas and I am so excited to choose from them and do something. 😀 So now I am gonna make a bucket list for the coming year. Wait for it.
My wish for you all is that may this year, you find the courage to love yourself, forgive yourself, get over your mistakes and the mistakes of others, forget a few horrible things that may have happened in the past and just get swept along the breeze of 2016 and get yourself out there for some new experiences. For you never know what life has in store for you. Maybe you will find yourself getting luckier! Obviously the devil will try to ruin it or get in the way with his best friend fear in tow. Do your best warrior! 😀 Rwarrrr!
Happy New Year! Gambatte!