I have been on and off from blogging world for almost a month now.
MY EXCUSE: Been SICK lately and with job, blog became my second choice. I had to maintain my time between job and rest. Gave it sometime and laziness crept in from the silent corners of my sickly world. Now that I feel a bit better I am back.
Where art thou?
Where art thou?? A popular way of asking where are you? Romeo oh Romeo. Thanks William Shakespeare for giving us words and worlds we talk about more often than we talk about our economy, although you are hard to understand just like the economical speculations.
I hardly wrote anything serious in last 25 days and that’s been making me cranky and even unbearable at times. Thankfully, now I have made peace with it and I just let it go if I can’t write on few days. But give it more than ten days and I feel like I have become a mistress to my laziness and I am cheating on my passions. Awful but that’s exactly how I felt n those days when I was good enough to write but I didn’t. Whenever I felt like I won’t be able to write anymore, like a crazy woman I kept asking myself, “where art thou?” Where the hell have you gone my creative passion, my inner writer?” A small voice from some inner place replied to my plea with, “Still here, you lazy old woman.” I kept feeling like, “Oh, thank God, it’s still there.” I can’t tell how hard it will get if the voices and the voice that gives those voices their voice died. I bet that didn’t make much sense, but that’s how living with voices in your head feels.
Now that I am writing I can’t tell how wonderful it feels to be writing again. I am not writing much and my head isn’t working much either but Thank GOD.
Today, I want to talk about my sickness and long breaks in blog. It might get boring, so if you are looking for thrill, go somewhere else.
Still here? Okay, listen… errr, Read…
There are a few things I learnt from being sick often and one of them is I should be ready for the bad times in life.
You never know when you are going to get a hard hit. Being the healthiest person in my home I never thought I would get to this level of sickness where getting out of bed would become a chore rather than the happy activity with which I started my day. Even though I ended up with a job I didn’t want in the first place I still loved it, it gave me the much-needed opportunity to learn more about people, behavioral psychology and it gave me this feeling of independence and not being a burden on my parents. I learnt so much about myself in the process.
Although it’s my own fault that I got sick like this. No one plans to get sick and nor did I, I am at fault because I didn’t pay attention when I was becoming sick. Listen to your body. My body kept warning me for the coming disaster but I hardly noticed. I was neck-deep in my work life and soon my health became much worse and I had to take 3 month leave from work so I can recuperate. I have severe deficiencies and I am taking medications for it but it’s not enough. My reports show the same status they had last year. Medicines aren’t enough for sure and now that I can eat well, my recovery will get faster. Seriously, when you are sick and you actually pay attention to your body, you will get the signs of what your body requires to get better. Medicines are useful to treat a symptom, it can not and never will get you healthy. Being healthy is living without medication.
I was mentally disturbed during the time when my body was slowly succumbing to sickness. Pay attention to your mental issues and sort them out as soon as possible. if you need time make sure you are paying proper attention to your body. Depression is not a fashion statement. It’s something to talk about and sort out so that you can live a better life. Remember that, there’s always something better. If you ever come across someone who needs help, be genuine, help for real, don’t make them a laughing-stock.
If you need help, ask for it. I did and I received it from people I didn’t think could help. 🙂 Though I find it hard to trust people now, I still give it a try. People can be surprising. Not everyone will understand so be ready for few heart breaks too. Don’t be too trusting. 🙂 It’s one mistake I still make even after being cheated so many times, I am still learning.
At the end of the day, life is pretty freaking amazing and you must enjoy it. You might feel like a screw up now but get stronger, life is stranger then you (or I) know! Life is here to be lived. So let the past be past and future be future. Enjoy the NOW. 🙂 You are given chance at living so, give life a chance to happen to you too. Stop thinking too much and just live. 🙂
Where art thou? It’s all within you. The great answer that everyone looks for, is You, Know THYSELF.
That’s it for now.
Have a happy day dear ones. 🙂